Welcome to today's companion post for Writer's Connect newsletter Issue 64. Therein, we discussed what not to do when describing characters, settings, or locations—namely, halting the narrative to indulge in long-winded descriptions.
By way of an alternative, we suggested that description should occur while the story is in motion. But what does that mean, and what does it look like? Clarifying that, dear reader, is our noble purpose of the day!
Thank you to Tyrone Couch for contributing this blog.
We Get It Already
The average reader comes preloaded with years of exposure to media, popular culture, and vaguely accurate historical knowledge. As dire as that may be for the future of our species, it's great for writers, since we don't have to go to great lengths to explain what a pyramid or a spaceship is whenever we mention them. Mention either of those things, and the reader will immediately form an image in their mind.
Why, then, should you go into painstaking detail to communicate the concept?
With a single reference or comparison, you can tell a reader everything they need to know about a character or environment without ever actually describing them. Following on from the above, this is another space in which you can tap into the collective unconscious and let it do some of the work for you.
For example, when describing a gothic castle, you've done the great majority of the work simply by introducing it as a gothic castle. Thus, if you're going to elaborate on its appearance, you don't want to describe the defining features of a gothic castle (e.g., large stained glass windows, flying buttresses, etc.). Instead, you want to focus on the qualities that make it unique, or areas where there is room for variance.
In short, it's fine to give two or three details to distinguish your starship from the Millennium Falcon ... but unless painting complex and detailed pictures with words is your thing, you don't need to spend five paragraphs doing it.
Describe Without Describing
The beginning of your book is far and away one of the hardest-working sections. In essence, it is what will either sell your book or relegate it to the Lifeline bargain bin.
As such, it's pretty important that you don't use it to introduce all of your characters like this:
Trevor was a 6'4", athletic, muscular manin his mid-thirties with brown, shoulder-length hair, hazel eyes, a scar under his left temple, tattoos on the back of his hands, an earring on each ear, a tidy goatee, faint bags underneath his eyes, and a slight limp.
He walked into the office and saw Ruby, the receptionist. Ruby was 5'6" and of average build with auburn curls, green eyes, fair skin, and a beauty spot just above her collarbone. Her torso was quite short in proportion to the rest of her ... etc.
To be clear, there's nothing wrong with giving the reader any of these details. They're all interesting things to note and give a rough idea of how the character looks. It's not about what details you give, but how you give them.
One of the problems with descriptions like the above is that as you're giving them, nothing is really happening. The characters themselves are totally disembodied, and no actions are taking place. Not only that, but the information is given as cold, hard data—informative, but bland and colourless. They effectively bring your whole narrative grinding to a halt.
This does not make for good reading.
Why not let people know about these traits with flair, right in the middle of the action? Here are some examples of alternative deliveries for some of the above details:
He frowned, tucking a stray lock of long, brown hair behind his ear.
Scratching at the scar beneath his left temple, he grunted in affirmation.
He noted a beauty spot on her collarbone, marring fair skin that was otherwise flawless.
She looked at herself in the window's reflection, cursing her disproportionate upper body.
The key here is that you don't have to deliver every little detail all at once. Such information can be staggered through the introductory scene and snuck into little events like so. It's far less invasive, much more creative, and keeps everything flowing nice and smoothly.
It's No Use!
The main reason that people tend to launch into extended descriptions is that they have a very specific image in their minds, and they want to make absolutely sure that this image is communicated to their reader as intended.
However, if you've ever looked at fan art or watched a movie based on a book, you'll know that a reader's interpretation of a fictional character in literature is influenced heavily by their own personal bias, and can differ greatly from person to person.
In other words, no matter how specific you get, everyone is going to put their own spin on your characters and environments. This is not something to be feared, but embraced! It's one of the great things about the reader-writer relationship. There are few things more satisfying than your work taking on a life on its own.
Cloying is how you might describe a romance novel, a too-strong perfume, or someone who is excessively coy; sickeningly sweet or sentimental, typically to the point that it evokes a negative response.
The movie was well received, but many considered the protagonist's love interest to be cloying and obnoxious.
Quotidian Quote
"Don't go into great detail describing places and things, unless you're Margaret Atwood and can paint scenes with language." ~ Elmore Leonard
Get Competitive!
A selection of current writing competitions YOU can enter!
The Masters Review Summer Short Story Award For New Writers
Format: Short story Theme: Any Word Count: max. 6,000 Entry Fee: $20 Prize: $3,000 plus publication Closes: 28/08/2022
Before you go all-in on an entry for any of the above competitions, it's highly recommended that you look over the fine print to make sure that your submission qualifies and you're happy with the terms of engagement.
To help yourself make an informed decision, the Australian Society of Authors has a highly informative post on their website called 'What to look for in a writing competition's T&Cs' . To locate the article, click on 'Home', then 'News'.
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